Crossing to the world of Paranoia. .

Paranoia -

n a mental illness characterized by delusions of grandeur and persecution; (inf) unfound fear, suspicion.

It is said well, maybe i have this effin’ fear. A unfound fear, haha! I am too scared, or perfectly defined as PARANOID.  I hate doing things na i know there’s nothing wrong, but if trouble comes, i have a feeling that it is all about me, or that’s my fault.

Why am i telling this, it’s because i have two friends (Yes they’re girls). Who have this conflicts, or a unclosed problems. Dahil sa pagiging gusto ko sila maging kaibigan, naramdaman ko one time na naiipit ako. I just don’t know why, maybe because, baka magalit yung isa pag nalaman niyang close na kami nung isa.

Well at first, D and i became friends first. We’ve shared alot of chismis about C. And i make a conclusions that, ah ganon siya, something like that. And then there’s this one time, i saw C walking with ♥’s friends. Eh may konklusyon akong ganon si C, na ganyan si C. So being a ♥’s Gf i panic, i don’t know if it’s the right term for that. Because ♥’s and i don’t have alot of time together when were on school, so he’s being with his friends. The moment i saw them naasar ako. The night after i saw her, i’ve realized, maybe i just don’t know her yet, maybe she’s not like that. So i removed my post on my Fb. Didn’t know, na nabasa na pala ni C. I don’t know how! Sabi naman niya jma daw. (Okay na yun past i past)

And then after that we have this conversation, so naging okay na kami.

Ang problem is, D and i are close friends. Hindi ko alam magiging reaction niya kung malaman niyang may ganon factor na kami ni C. Bumili pa si C sa store ko sa multiply.

(idrathergishopping.multiply.com)

Then months past. D saw me and C walking from CBA to GDO parking, C is about to get her orders. Nahirapan akong batiin si D, kasi siyempre nakita niyang kasama ko si C eh.

Sumakay ng kotse niya si D, madiin ang tapak sa silinyador (so parang magbburnout ). I told C, “tumabi ka, baka mabangga ka”. haha!

Nagtanguan naman kami ni D.

And then now!!

November 30, 2009

I am with ♥ sa manila. Since manila known as magulong lugar, snatcher, Rugby boys, baliw, sigawan, dami tao. I kept my phone sa bag and hug it so tight. haha! (Hindi na kasi ako makakabili ng bagong phone kapag nawala ko to)

Pag-check ko, D texted me, calling me IMEE where we used to call each other as HUN. Siyempre on my part, this girl is deeply mad. WOW! And then E also have a message. Parang finorward lang niya sakin yung tinext niya kay D. Nagulat ako siyempre, parang ako yung may kasalanan sa mga text sakin ni D. Kaya hindi ako mapakali, kahit gano ka delikado sa maynila ay nakipag sapalaran akong itext padin sila Tapos hindi ko na kinaya, kaya tinago ko na ulit ang cp. And then when ♥ and i were about to go home na, i texted the 3,  C, D, E.  Nice names huh!

They all texted me that okay na daw, and it’s PERFECT na daw. Pare-pareho sila ng text.

Then pinipilit kong ikwento nila, wag na daw ako ma-paranoid.

Everything’s okay na daw. They are now friends,and i’m happy for that.

But i can’t help myself.

Because here i am again, I’m. .

Crossing to the world of paranoia.

Jbred123

jbred123.webs.com

This is Jb’s web. Kailangan daw ata sa school?

Whenever i open his website, i feel so blessed. Kasi alam ko he’s proud of me. LOL! It’s true. Read it, here’s the link http://jbred123.webs.com/apps/blog/show/2209325-down-9829-

Know why? Kasi in his first blog, he don’t feel ashamed. Sapakin ko siya kung ikahiya niya ako.

I feel so blessed, kasi he’s my other half that makes me whole. Basta kakaiba, super different from others. He’s one of a kind. All-in-one na kung baga. In a way na, he always want me feel special that there are times that i don’t feel it but i know for him I AM SPECIAL! HAHA! Kasi naman moody ako, kaya pag natrip-an ko na magalit, nagagalit ako kahit na sa kabila ng irita ko lalamutakin na lang ang mukha ko at pagtritripan na lang ako.

Para sakin, siya na ang huli kong mamahalin. I really don’t picture myself with someone, na hawak kamay ko, katabi ko, something like that. Lagi siya ang nakikita ko, nararamdaman ko. uber na to ah!

Bi this is a super blog for you! Super puri na’to bi ha. haha!

I know Jb and I will last forever. I always ask to Papa God na siya na

So, ito muna tonight, will Fb na

Goodnight wordpress!

I LOVE YOU JOAQUIN BENJAMIN REDILLA ♥

After months of FB’ing.

Hello WordPress!

I am so busy this past few months, why? haha! Because of FB thingy Playing Farm Town is making my stress away. LOL! As if i have problems to be stressful baby! aw. Well i’m just so much inspired on my Bibi’s website. He make a website at webs.com, a free website. I juts want to have one, but i have realized that, this blog site, i can’t open much, how bout that site? Get it?

And, i don’t have lot of time pa kasi. I just want to share my experience for the whole day of my life. Eh kasi talkative! Kwento lang ako. Hmm, thinking if Jb really wants to open his site as in like everyday, ewan ko lang. Last night he said buksan ko daw. Bukas makalawa yan, pak! Tatamadin din yan.

Pinoy Big Brother.

I am a PBB addict. : ) Lagi ko ng pinapanuod ang PBB every 10pm. I am fun of watching melissa and jason. They have a common personality that is why they jive always. I love bog brother, tama lang na nilipat niya si melissa sa House A, para lumabasa ang ugali ni jason. Kasi before, melissa stayed at House B (with yuri,carol,mariel etc. .) in that House, siya lang ang makulit. Where jason, at House A, a quite type of person, maybe he’s too shy by that time, nangangapa pa sa housemates.

Pero nung nilipat si melissa, lagi na sila magkasama. Magkausap and something. Melissa is very friendly, lahat kasundo siya. haha! I juts don’t like her facial expression whenever Kuya is talking to her. But sometimes, funny na din. haha!

Last night.

Sa PBB, kinikilig ako. Though i don’t have the feeling to jason who will fall in love to melay soon. Kasi alam ko lang, nag jjive ang kanilang personality which they build a mutual understanding, and isa pa, sila lang ang tao sa loob ng bahay, right? So in that case, nakahanap sila ng magandang samahan, na nagdulot sa pagbuhay kay Baby Dengue? haha! Hanggang sa umabot ng paglilitis para sa kostodiya ng bata! : ) wow!

RB.

Rb is here na, so i guess i should stop blogging na for this morning. I need to prepare for my class at 12pm na din naman eh. Blaw102! Hi ma’am tarro! : )

Bye wordpress!

Girls, let us talk about gossip thingy!

GOSSIP ATTACKS

The old saying “Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words will never hurt you”  never took into account how badly we can hurt on the inside when vicious things are said about us. while it is true that such words don’t leave anu permanents physical scars, it is up to us to make sure that they don’t leave any permanent psycological scars either.

Here are some things that you can do to make sure that your heart stays clean through it all:

Forgive. Before you do anything else,clear your heart before God and forgive those who have spoken wickedly about you. The Bible tells us repeatedly that unforgiveness does us more harm than the person hurts us.

Don’t feed the fire. Proverbs 26:20 NLT TELL US, Fire  goes out for lack of fuel, and quarrels disappear when gossip stops. Don’t counterattack. If people don’t see you publicy lash back or overreact, then it often kills the fun of gossiping about you and it will stop. As much as you can, don’t fuel their gossiping with more things to say about you.

Talk it out face-to-face. As the old saying goes, “Honesty is the best policy.” If you have been hurt by someone, then go speak with them one-on-one and tell them how what they said hurt you. Let them know that you have forgiven them. If they still are spitful, then it is no longer your problem. You have done what you and they need to deal with their own problems. But more often you will win back a friend.

Gossip can be like a time bomb (Yow!) If you ignore it or pretend like it isn’t there, it will eventually explode; but if you defuse it, it can harmlessly be thrown away.

Choose to defuse, not explode.

maligayang isang taon!

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY

JOAQUIN BENJAMIN MORALES REDILLA

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

i am so thankful, kasi sa dami ng lalake sa mundo
ikaw yung dumating at binigay sa’kin

our relationship is not that so perfect

but in our hearts, we spend a perfect time
shared a perfect love
shared a perfect kiss
shared a perfect touch
shared a perfect life
that came right and so perfect

you never fail
you never quit
you never forgot
you never find
and so do i

our love is
PERFECT ♥

PROMISES
made to be broken
but all
I DO’s
will never hurt us again

I LOVE YOU
JOAQUIN BENJAMIN MORALES REDILLA

rainy morning

hello!!

it was really really raining outside, at super masarap talagang matulog. tell me im right! well, nagising naman kami ni mother dear 8am i guess? so parang hindi kami na apektuhan ng malamig na panahon at masarap na tulog dahil sa pag patak ng ulan sa bubong. i guess, were so masipag, haha! : ) anyway, i cant help myself to be so sad, kasi naman i hate seeing someone na sad, last night kasi she texted me, ayoko ng ganon! kasi lalake problema eh, martyr na, well ako i should say naging martyr ako, but i know, na theres still love behind that. and nagiging special parin ako, i dont know why that guy is so manhid, do i need to say that guy is manhid, or she never said words directly? hindi rin, kung talgang espesyal naman diba why not effort muvh? wala naman mawawala eh. sabi ni jb kagabi, sabihin daw walang ibang suggestion kundi break un daw sabihin ko. but still i respect her decision kung saan sya maging masaya okay, pero i told her not to linger. haha : ) diba, dont let it linger sabi nga sa kanta! kasi hindi lang yun ang magpapasaya sa tao! lalo na sa katulad nyang babae!

may mai-blog lang ako. haha!

ay kanina pala tinignana ko multi ko and my post yung friend ko SNN about rica, ikakasal nga daw, and sa baba ng video may link about Francis M.’s secret daw, i opened it, nakakgulat! why ngayon lumalabas yung ganun issue? wala man lang respect sa family na naiwan ni Francis. to share this is the link

http://irishonbizz.blogspot.com/2009/06/secrets-of-francis-m-spreading-on-net.html

sabi nung isa pang ng comment kaya daw pala hindi umiyak si pia, anu ba yun, na issue na ang pagiyak ni pia? hehe.at yung isa naman sabi kaya pala daw yung francis jr eh may tampo kay francis m, malay mo kaya nagtampo eh my promise na gift hindi nabile. wag natin issue-han agad, let see na lang. hehe! nagiging showbiz lover na ba ako? yun lang. .

pasok na sa monday!!! : ) wala pa akong payong!! hindi makabile kasi ayaw lumabas ng bahay. pero my notebuk nko! more pa need! and wala pa akong ballpen! hehehe : ) stroller bag pa!! darn! joke. .

bbye blog!! i love you, your very user friendly.aw? ☻

that DRAMA, i dont want it ANYMORE!

i will love him forever
this is not a joke
or something make everyone kilig
this is not just I will
BUT
i promise

i am willing to
cry
hurt
misunderstood
accept
physical hurt
foul words

this is all because
i love him
i treasure everything between me and him
i dont want him to go
i know he loves me too
we love each other
we make plans together

and

i feel that i dont have
HAPPINESS
without him

i dont have
SMILE

i dont feel
COMPLETE

i feel like im
ALONE

HE REALLY STOLE MY HEART

i will never leave your side
and if i will

thats when im celebrating a cup of coffee or tea
with crying ladies in our house.

which i really mean is

TILL DEATH DO US PART

If me tears is still falling with you
this is because

I LOVE YOU

i am crazy over you

no other man can make me feel like this

your an amazing guy

you mesmerized me
with your

EYES

your soft

TOUCH

your sweet

KISS

your warm

EMBRACE

i will never forget the times were so

HAROT

our

FIRSTS

holding hands
kiss
hug
touch
talk
laugh
cry
miss
captured moments

i remember the feeling

when you first touch my hip gently

you hold my hand even if your driving

you kiss me while your driving

i also remember the time

you wipe my leg because theres putik

the time you told me

“tumahimik ka! pag aaralin kita!”

the time you tell me your past love story
and in the end of the story your telling me that

“Ikaw lang minahal ko ng ganto. mahal na mahal”

i remember the time you
SING
to me at random times

i also remember when your telling me silly things

and when im already mad

you told me that

“nilalambing lang kita, love you na. .”

i miss you when

kz is looking for her

Tito JB

when your calling me

MIMEE

im sorry

for the times that i never show you how

THANKFUL
i am because of you

i just kiss you while driving and whisper

“Lord Thank you!!”

im sorry if i dont say

SORRY
when im incorrect

i just cry, looking up and tell Him

“Lord im sorry,
‘wag nyo po sya ilalayo sakin. .”

this is the first time i will blog and tell you

Mr. Joaquin Benjamin Morales Redilla

that

I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU
I AM VERY VERY SORRY

IM SO THANKFUL AND BLESSED
BECAUSE I HAVE YOU

BECAUSE YOU LOVE ME
BECAUSE YOUR KIND TO ME
MY FAMILY

THANKYOU
FOR EVERYTHING!!

IKAW NA TRIALS KA! WAHAHA! TATALUNIN KITA!!!

GOODMORNING SUNSHINE!!

Hello!! i just woke up, and i want to check my blogsite, so i decided To wrote some ek ek here. First, bago ako mg computer, i check my cellphone, and dami text ng gudnyt, na hindi ko na nabasa lasT night kasi nakatulog na ako. and then i texted him, hindi parin clear ang lahat, there still misunderstanding between us, i want to decide na sana, pero i want it to be very very clear, kasi baka in the end ako lang ang magsisi. i really love him, yung pinagsamahan namin, until one day nagsimula na sya mag build ng PRIDE sa buhay niya, and then ayun, nagkaroon kami ng mga ganitong bagay.hindi na namin alam kung anu ba, i mean are we really meant to love each other? hindi ko naman masasabi na sya na makakasama ko kaya for now, medyo hindi ako nag mamadali na ayusin lahat AGAD kasi kung kami di ba kami?hehe! pero pinagdadasal ko naman na kung kami, gumawa si God ng way na magkakaroonkami ng pagkakaintindihan. and if not, ihelp Nya kami na tanggapin yun.

actually sa totoo lang, gusto ko naman magkayus kami eh. pero sa tuwing maguusap kami, lagi parin sumbat or anything away lang ang nangyayare.

so sayang pala ang unlimited150 ko. hahaha!!which is 10 days!

next month 1 year na kami. bakit ganun noh, kapag tumatagal na nandun na yung trials. well, siguro kasi kung kami, malagpasan namin yun, pampatibay kung baga! hahaha! : ) haha, strong person ata ako, kaya ko to! kahit anung sakit kaya ko tiisin! kaya…..

IKAW NA TRIALS KA! WAHAHA! TATALUNIN KITA!!!

CONTEST MO, PUSO KO.

hahaha! nabasa ko yung blog ni xhaway na bout contest contest so ayun, nag edit ako. .

edit? yan ang super lagi ko inuubos ang oras ko.  eh what ba dapat i-expect, maarte kasi ako eh. . haha!

yan. this is ate joyce. .  GT’s ate.

wala ako magawa gusto ko lang malaman na marunong din ako mg edit. wahahaha!

inaaliw ko na din ang sarile ko ^_^ kasi ayoko nga magmukmok at bilangin ang patak ng ulan. hirap yun ah!

GO BACK TO MY ♥

so ayan nga. . sabi nga pala ng mami ko, wala na ko nakasundong bf! in short baka malas ako sa pag-ibig?haha! well, if thats the case, sana swerte din ako sa career! haha : ) diba? para may sense duh! nabwibwisit ako!! eh kasi sabi now lang huh, ng mami ko, wag ko na lang daw pansinin si jb kung ganon sya, darn! how can i??napaka hirap nun ah, sa totoo lang! hindi lang kasi siya basta seloso eh. .may time na hirap siya umintindi. i really want to have time to myself na pumunta sa tahimik at ako lang na lugar so i can shhhhhoooooouuuutttt as loud as i can!!!! i am effin badtrip talaga!! bakit naman kasi araw araw na lang, kelangan mag emote? well, as i can say, sa sitwasyon ko? i am tha stronger person parin! yung iba dyan, wala!! todo emote! buti nga marunong pa ko mag blog eh, na eexpress ko yung nararamadamn ko! right? parang oras oras na ko nag bblog ngayon araw? hahaha! basta still im happy, happy because i have:

• family

• friends

• love

kahit pa nagkakaroon ng ganitong eksena, i know in 11 months with him, i am lucky. and i want to be lucky forever! gets the sense? get it! i love my life, i love being imee. i love being madaldal and friendly as well, i love making chikka every time, every second. i love everything in my ♥ HEART!!

i am so in love ♥

I AM SO IN LOVE

after all trials. pain. tears. hurt. i still keep on falling in love with him. i dont know why, i juts know is, my heart is beating his name with his last name. im still dreaming of a perfect raltionship with him. i dont know why my spirit have alot of strength to trust and believe that

WE’LL STILL HAVE A PERFECT RALATIONSHIP

oh diba ang lakas ng spirit! I only have this kind of spirit. this is all i have. and i am fighting for this thing.

life woulve be the same without him.

nahhh!! i know madami pang iba dyan, but i remember one of my girlfriend told me

BAKIT LAHAT BA SILA KAYA MONG MAHALIN?

yeah she’s right. pero one girlfriend said

KUNG HINDI MO NA KAYA TAMA NA, ‘WAG MO PAHIRAPAN SARILI MO

hahaha!

basta mahal ko, im willing to stil try. .haha i remember i told myself “last na to, kapag hindi parin okay, wala na ‘to” haha! how many times!! aw. .help me!! i actually really dont know what to do. linger!!